Archive for April, 2005

One of the ways spam tries to avoid your spam filter is by including random legitimate words in the subject header. These random words also serve as a unique tag so that the spammer can identify where responses come from.

However, because these are randomly generated, and usually combined with some catchphrase such as “this is the best” or “no appointment needed” for various illegal pharmaceuticals, the resulting subject header is sometimes rather humorous. I present here some that I have collected for your amusement.

stay hard longer electrolytic miscreant
this is the best cloudburst stumpy
more girth=happy women year muff
No-Appointment cellar slurry Americana
disc_ direct thwack fireproof gage
No-Appointment gland alienate fatten
no_hassles horehound managua bouffant
i just got mine scenic shrewd volume
No-Appointment anorexia eighteen incapacity
still growing frostbite degumming
Now you can have her thorpe disembowel
my nights are better gunflint clamorous
sacrifice a little lanka diamond
your life could be bigger checkbook zesty
what if you had … quart koala
unidirectional sordid whirlpool
so strong so big twenty tradeoff
thanks for letting me know cryptology breeze
“corpulent decipher deterred debugging bonnet broil arabic boolean climate dixon balance atmospheric determinate debtor adjectival”
it depends on you cicada avocate
dont laugh you need it coroner elaine
so strong so big knot cutthroat
because she wanted it whereas harlem
im glad i found it galapagos loaf
she wants you to be … handicap celtic
she wants you to be … inconsiderate parenthood
why would you duet collide
you are an exception medicine diplomatic
you were wrong cataclysm chromosphere
i told you so scribble boar
i tried, it worked leopard no
get those inches cattle agrimony
Embarrassed? Not any more! big nautical
my nights are better tungstate cowpunch
more pleasure for you and her automatic plutonium
xtra size is better transvestite bookish
it worked for me orphanage malcontent
why would you sprinkle trojan

And last but not least, my personal favorite: she won’t quit cranelike hydrodynamic. The mental image it conjures is…interesting.

Welcome Instapundit readers! Please pull up a chair and make yourself at home. There’s lots more in the archives to read.

Many people are familiar by now with the incident in the news where a woman claimed to have found a human finger in her chili at Wendy’s. This incident took place in my home town of San Jose, California, and the San Jose Police arrested the woman in question (Anna Ayala) last week for perpetrating a hoax. She has been charged with attempted grand theft for the enormous financial loss that Wendy’s has suffered as a result of this hoax and its publicity.

The location where this took place has suffered tremendously, to the point that they had to cut back hours for their employees. To draw back customers, all the Wendy’s locations in the Bay Area were giving away free Frosties this past weekend. Kyle and I are so enraged by this fraud that we decided to eat at Wendy’s yesterday to show our support for the company.

As it happens, the Wendy’s closest to us geographically is THE very restaurant where this finger incident took place. What better place to go to show our support? I decided to log our lunch adventure.


The Wendy’s in question on Monterey in San Jose. Hmm, doesn’t look like business is too bad today.


Things are looking good on the inside, too. The dining room was full.



No free Frosties for us, but I did decide to have chili, just for principle’s sake. It was very tasty. No human body parts detected.


The chicken sandwich is very good, too. Crispy whole chicken breast. Mmm.


Our receipt, just to prove we went to the Monterey Wendy’s. Our lovely cashier was Adelaida, who seemed very bemused by my picture-taking.

All in all a nice lunch. The menu is quite large now, and includes lots of chicken options as well as burgers. Baked potatoes and salads are still a staple, along with the chili and Frosties. I’ll have to go back again soon. I forgot how much I like it.

Addendum: A couple of comments raised the question of where the finger came from, and a brief report in the news recently about someone who lost a finger and had come forward for DNA testing.

60 miles away from Las Vegas lives a woman named Sandy Allman. She had a pet leopard which bit off part of her finger on Feb 23. Doctors were not able to reattach it, but the finger itself went missing from the hospital and was not recovered. Allman has come forward and volunteered for DNA testing to see if it is her finger that wound up in the Chili.

Authorities are dubious of a connection between these two incidents. It also seems a bit of a reach to me. But if police could place Ayala in that same hospital at the time Allman was there, it is possible that somehow Ayala discovered and stole the detached finger, perhaps from an unattended room or something like that.

Again, one has to question the motive. Would Ayala have seen the finger and thought, “Hmm, I bet I could defraud someone with this.” Or perhaps it was already on her mind to engage in some kind of restaurant contamination fraud and the opportunity presented itself.

I have not seen any further news on Sandy Allman. Wendy’s has doubled their reward to $100,000 for information leading to the positive ID of the finger’s origin.

Back in 2003 there was a widely-publicized incident of vandalism at several car dealerships and homes in an L.A. borough. 125 SUVs were destroyed either by arson or spray painting them with environmental slogans such as “Fat Lazy Americans”, “polluter”, and “ELF” (Earth Liberation Front).

William Jensen Cottrell was identified as one of the culprits after emails to the L.A. Times were traced to him at Caltech (not the brightest move for a doctoral candidate). His co-conspirators, Tyler Johnson and Michie Oe, are believed to have fled the country.

Cottrell, however, was caught and has received no leniency in spite of his pleas to the judge.


U.S. District Judge R. Gary Klausner said Cottrell had engaged in domestic terrorism and “we’re very, very lucky” that no one was killed in the arson attacks.

Cottrell, 24, was convicted in November of conspiracy to commit arson and seven counts of arson for an August 2003 vandalism spree that damaged and destroyed about 125 SUVs at dealerships and homes in the San Gabriel Valley east of Los Angeles.

Cottrell was acquitted of using a destructive device — Molotov cocktails — in a crime of violence. That was the most serious charge he faced and it carried a sentence of at least 30 years in prison.

The judge said he felt sorry for Cottrell, a doctoral candidate in the physics department at the California Institute of Technology in Pasadena, but he had only himself to blame.

“What a talent to have wasted,” Klausner said.

[Cottrell was] sentenced to more than eight years in federal prison and ordered to pay $3.5 million in restitution.

Rot in prison, you little bitch. We’re not accepting the “I made a mistake, I’ll never ever do it again” thing anymore. Such wanton destruction, regardless of the strength of your convictions, is totally unacceptable. Grow up.

Once again, technology makes a breakthrough that adds to mankind’s knowledge of his own history.

In the late 1800’s, some 400,000 fragments of nasty, decayed, worm-eaten papyrus were dug up from a trash heap outside an ancient Graeco-Egyptian town in central Egypt. It’s known as the Oxyrhynchus collection, named after the town in question.

They were unreadable at the time, but Oxford recognized the potential historical value of the material and squirreled it away in the Sackler Library. The theory was, “Well, we can’t read it now, but someday we will be able to.”

That time is now. And it may transform our historical knowledge of the world.


The previously unknown texts, read for the first time last week, include parts of a long-lost tragedy – the Epigonoi (“Progeny”) by the 5th-century BC Greek playwright Sophocles; part of a lost novel by the 2nd-century Greek writer Lucian; unknown material by Euripides; mythological poetry by the 1st-century BC Greek poet Parthenios; work by the 7th-century BC poet Hesiod; and an epic poem by Archilochos, a 7th-century successor of Homer, describing events leading up to the Trojan War. Additional material from Hesiod, Euripides and Sophocles almost certainly await discovery.

Last week’s remarkable finds also include work by Euripides, Hesiod and Lucian, plus a large and particularly significant paragraph of text from the Elegies, by Archilochos, a Greek poet of the 7th century BC.

Sophocles is best known for works such as Oedipus Rex and Antigone. Now, for the first time, we have recovered portions of a lost play called Epigonoi (“The Progeny”), which is the story of the siege of Thebes. A bit of the text has already been translated:


Speaker A: . . . gobbling the whole, sharpening the flashing iron.

Speaker B: And the helmets are shaking their purple-dyed crests, and for the wearers of breast-plates the weavers are striking up the wise shuttle’s songs, that wakes up those who are asleep.

Speaker A: And he is gluing together the chariot’s rail.

The researchers at Oxford also believe that they are likely to recover lost Christian gospels, dating back to the earliest books of the New Testament. Can you believe it? Lost Christian gospels!

Any way you look at it, this is a colossally important (re)discovery in human history which will contribute not merely to our literary canon from the Ancient World, but our understanding of those ancient civilizations and how modern Western society evolved from it.

To think it all came from a trash heap!

Hat tip to The Light of Reason and PhysOrg.

This is the sort of thing I would probably do if I ran a business where PETA showed up:


BROWNSVILLE, Texas (AP) – A trio of protesters with People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals didn’t find the welcome mat out when they stopped at a KFC in Brownsville on Wednesday. The sprinkler system was on for them, though.

John Olivo, the manager of the fast-food chicken restaurant, turned the system on full blast to soak the curbside protesters. And a man who eats beef followed them around with his stepchildren and a microphone.

The PETA protesters, including one in a chicken suit, are participating in PETA’s campaign to get KFC to pressure slaughter houses to use more humane methods to kill chickens.

“They already hit me in McAllen,” Olivo said in a story in Thursday’s editions of The Brownsville Herald. “I was already waiting for them here in Brownsville.”

Comedy gold. “Hey, it’s not my fault you guys decided to show up when the sprinkler timer is set to go off.”

The bitch is dead!

It’s because of people like Andrea Dworkin that the legitimate cause of equal rights for women became a crusade against men, heterosexuality, and the entire concept of personal responsibility. I have read her work. In spite of her claims, she was a man-hater who equated heterosexual sexual relations with violence and force.

To her, women were all inherently powerless, victims of the men in their lives and men in society that they didn’t even know. Pornography was a weapon, its creation an act of violence against all women, and the men who read it were all misogynists with a rapist’s urges ready to burst forth at any moment.

Andrea Dworkin claimed to have been abused as a child and as a young woman. Whether her specific allegations are true or not, she was obviously a very disturbed young woman who grew into an adult unable to cope with or resolve her own internal torment. She chose to project it out into the world and find some justification to accuse men like my husband of being little more than wild animals at heart who delight in subjugating women and whose appreciation for boobies translates into an innate malevolence toward the opposite sex.

She set the cause of true equality for women back at least 3 generations, and warped the perspective of millions of young people on the relations between the sexes and the healthy expression of sexual desire. She told us we were powerless against men, vulnerable to being shattered into a thousand pieces by the heavy hand of the male in our world. She abdicated personal responsibility for our actions and character as women, took away our strength as human beings and paradoxically made us even more dependent on the men who allegedly dominate our existence.

I spit on her grave!

Update [Kyle]: You know, if you feel strongly about Andrea Dworkin, you should just come out and clearly express it. Don’t conceal your views behind mealy-mouthed evasions, half-statements and innuendo.

B-)

Sometimes the cleverest advertising ideas are not the most expensive.

This one is the brainchild of JWT Sdn Bhd agency for a Channel 9 Media TV news truck in Malaysia. It’s been nominated for a handful of awards, including a CLIO. Basically, they appear to be balloon missiles attached to some stiff wire. Presumably the truck should be driven by a crazy person in order to best simulate the escape attempt.